Friday, July 22, 2011

"Letters To Grayson"

Before I announced I was pregnant, I started keeping a journal online so I wouldn't forget any moment of pregnancy. I gradually converted that journal to my blog and this is where I have been keeping Grayson's "baby book". However, I want to include the 'before blog' journals in his book as well. These are a little personal as I was writing to Grayson not the outside blog world, but they are special to me and moments I never want to forget. So here are my "Letters To Grayson"...

Wednesday, December 29th 2010 -
"The Begining..."
Hey little booger! Well, it's only the begining and you have brought me so much joy in just the past week and a half. Your Daddy & I found out on December 17th that we were going to bring you into this world. We have prayed about you before you were even conceived and we feel so blessed to have this tiny little creation cooking in the oven! Nonna and Bic Bic have already bought you some fun things... imagine that! They are going to spoil you to pieces :) But, hey I guess that is what Grandmas are for. You already have so many people that love you!! I wanted to start a little journal so I could remember every little detail of the journey with you in my tummy. I don't want to forget a single day, even if I am hovering over the toilet (you are so worth it!). Well today I guess I got my first weird symptom. I have had the norm, sore boobs and extrememly tired, but today as I was driving to work I thought I was sniffing in chemicals. It smelled really strong and was not making me feel so swell. I checked my heat and everything was normal, then I realized your good ole' Pop had borrowed my car to go hunting and left rubber hunting mats in my car. They made me want to puke! I told Nonna and she said "it's only the begining". Hehe! Like I said, you are worth it. Can you believe you are only an 1/8th of an inch long?? Your Daddy showed me what that looked like on a ruler and you are tiny!! They compare that to the size of a chocolate sprinkle, yummy! Ha! I can't believe you are so tiny and you've already developed your heart and now your eyes, ears and mouth are forming. Wow, I am so amazed at you, my little miracle! This weekend is New Years and I have so much to be excited about in 2011!! 8 months from today I should have your little bitty body in my arms. Oh how I long for that day! I cannot wait to meet you! I can't wait to love you and give you the best life I can possibly give. What an amazing Creator we have that's working so hard creating this amazing life inside of me. Your Daddy and I feel so blessed. We love you already Itta Bena! :)Sweet Kisses, Mommy

Thursday, January 6th 2011-
"2nd Itta Bena Check up"
Hello my little blueberry! Your Daddy and I went to the doctor yesterday for your 2nd doctor appointment. They did all kinds of blood work and thanks to your sweet Daddy I did not pass out. Wow, I'm not quite sure I would have made it if I didn't know it was all for you! Everything looked great so far. Still too early to hear your little heartbeat, but we go back for the ultrasound in 2 weeks. I can't wait for what we will get to see!! I am amazed everyday at how you are growing. I've been trying to learn so much so I will know exactly what you are doing inside my tummy. Here's a little funny... we get little packets from the doctor each visit and this week was equipped with a little newborn diaper. When we got home I did a little 1 on 1 lesson with Daddy. It was too cute! It made my heart melt watching him! He is going to be the best Daddy and I know you will know that before too long! Just don't make too many really stinky diapers, because I'm pretty sure your clean freak Daddy will pass those along to me! :) I was talking to Nonna yesterday about how a calm has come over me when it comes to all the blood work I have to get done for you (so I thought until about the 12th vile yesterday) and she said that's just being a Mom. It really struck me that wow, I am going to be your MOM. That's a big word! I think back to the Mom that Nonna has been from day 1 and I just hope that I can be half the Mom she has been. I can't begin to even put it into words, but you will know exactly what I am talking about when you meet your Nonna. Even though it breaks my heart you will never get to meet your great Grandma Bibbie, Nonna is a replicate of what an amazing woman she was. I am so blessed and thankful that you get to experience the joy of life with such an amazing Grandma, like I did.We pray for you everyday... simply for just a happy, healthy boy or girl! We also pray that we will be the best parents we can be! I hope to guide you in the right direction all of your life and raise you in a strong Christian environment so you can experience all the wonderful gifts God will give you. I love you little angel and can't wait to hold you in my arms one day.

Wednesday, January 12th 2011-
"The Big Ultrasound"
Tomorrow we go to the doctor for your 1st ultrasound!! I am sooo excited! Your Daddy & I cannot wait to see your sweet face and arms and legs! I pray for you everyday, every moment I can that you will just be healthy. I do not care if you are a boy or girl, either way you will be perfect. We've already started a poll, Nonna is secretly thinking a girl & PC is pretty convinced you are a boy, ha! Your Daddy says "she" when he prays and I honestly don't have a clue! I usually always have a gut feeling when it comes to this stuff, but I truly don't. For some reason, I keep picturing a boy but I can also see a girl! Who knows? And what does it matter anyways? Well, I would like to go ahead and thank you for being so very kind to me in the morning sickness department. I have not gotten sick once {knock on wood}! I have been nauseous here and there, but I cannot complain. Sometimes, beside the fact that I'm pretty sleepy always, I feel too good to be pregnant. I just wanna make sure you are in there, ha! You have made me crave the weirdest things and dislike a lot of things too. I'm not quite sure the last time I ate peanut butter but sure had me some this week. Also, your Daddy gets a kick out of it, but the thought of Kentucky Fried Chicken and a McDonalds hamburger makes my mouth water (I usually do not let Daddy pull through Mickey D's drive through because I think it's gross). Ha, not at the moment. However, I have not broken down and eaten it yet. On Saturday we are having some of our close friends over to tell them your little self is on the way. I am so so excited! We've got a future Memphis Tiger shirt for the revealment. So fun! I cannot wait until we are able to spread the joy we have been feeling these past 9 weeks {well, 5 since we found out}. I feel so blessed beyond belief and maybe that's why sometimes I am like oh my gosh am I really going to have a baby?! But yes, it is times like those when I have to sit back and say to myself, yes, God is that amazing!! It is true!! Wow, how humbling:) I cannot wait till I find out what gender you are. Daddy is dying to do a revealment party with the cake so I think that is what we will do. Oh the joy in the room the day we find out, ah I cannot wait. Aunt Stephanie and I looked for you some clothes on the internet the other night. It's so hard to hold back, but I don't want to jump ahead too much and have my baby boy wearing ruffles. Speaking of Aunt Stephanie, you are going to love her! She is pregnant at the same time as Mommy and is going to have either a Leighton or Junior (we will explain when you get older, ha.) I know ya'll will be best friends!! I cannot wait for all the good times to come with friends and family! While were on the subject of Aunts, boy do you have some amazing aunts that already love you so. Aunt Lindz & Aunt Meg are going to be the best aunts ever! The day I see my sister hold you in her arms... wow. One day you will know how much you were already loved at just 9 weeks. For the first time ever I am hoping it will not snow today so that we will be able to make it to the doctor in the morning. Either way, keep on growing baby. Momma and Daddy love you so much! Kisses!

Tuesday, February 1st 2011-
"Bum, bump. Bum, bump."
We got to hear your sweet little heartbeat the other day!!! It was the most amazing sound I've ever heard! Your poor Daddy was going on no sleep and we had to reschedule the appointment due to ice on the roads, but it was well worth the wait! I will never forget the feeling I felt when I heard your heart just beating away. It was so loud and so strong it made my heart race. I have been waiting to hear that sweet sound for 9 weeks now and it gave my heart so much peace. You are really in there and ready to sprout!! We got to share the joy with all of our friends and let them know you are on the way! They were all so excited and even some of your friends came to share in on the excitement! Hudson, Ryder & Kate were playing away and pretty soon you will be there to join in on the fun! I can't wait until you are here, but take your time in there and grow big & strong! Your Daddy has been pushing me to drink my milk everyday so your bones are strong. I've incorporated it with some cereal to help, so I hope you are enjoying that! You must be growing away in there because you sure are making me exhausted. Right now I feel like I am rambling because I am so tired! But that's okay honey, you keep doing what you're doing! We get to go the doctor again 2 weeks from tomorrow and see you again!!! I cannot wait :) Until then, keep a-grownin' and never forget your Mommy & Daddy love you so much!
P.S. We've been telling Copper alllll about you. I think she's warming up to the idea:) I know she will love you and take such good care of you! Ah, a family of 4... sounds just about perfect!

Wow, reading those brings back so much emotion. I can't believe we only have 5 weeks left, it seems like yesterday...and to think my love for him has tripled:)

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